So, I took my laptop to Widener's ITS department because I couldn't connect to the internet and thought I'd have my laptop back by the end of the day, I thought wrong. It's been 6 days. ITS told me I have a massive virus on my computer and they're almost ready to wipe my hard drive... yay! (sarcasm) So you will have to excuse my absence from posting.
It has definitely been an interesting week though. Actually, it's been an interesting two months. And by interesting I mean the worst two months of my life. Explaining all of this to you would take forever so I'll give you the low-down.
It's no secret my family is crazy... And now I'm starting to question what that word means anymore, "family". My mom broke my bookshelf and everything on it by shoving it to the ground and my Grand-mom, she's made me start a countdown to when I can move out. The past two days have been like hell. I'm confused as to what people's definition's of the word "family" are because I think mine is a joke. My house is full of lies and secrets behind people's backs. And I know, I know, we all sin in out own special ways but this has gotten out of hand. My house has heard far too many curse words and yelling. Today especially was a reminder that nothing is safe or private since Facebook's were broken into and old messages were read and brought up...
I feel trapped. I've been torn between living at school next year or staying at home and commuting, I know can firmly say, I need to get out. Whether it be at Widener or halfway across the country. Since I'm not wanted, there's really no reason for me to stay anymore.
In the moments when I needed my friends the most, none of them were there. It wasn't their faults, they were busy with work and school and jobs but I couldn't help think of the one person who would of been there for me if they could have been. And I know for a fact they would have been there for me in an instant. Problem is, they're not here anymore. And as much as it feels like I'm stabbing myself to say this, it's not likely they will return. Since their life has moved on and I've been forgotten.
Au demain.
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